I have a PSA for all of you who were once BROKEN BY DYSFUNCTION.
Your path is not paved with trauma. In fact, you are just walking heavily each day waiting for the other shoe to drop because you are choosing it. AND THAT IS AN UNPOPULAR OPINION NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR. But it is a HARD #TRUTH. "I am not the kind of person who is x,y,z." "I cannot leave this person or thing, or else what will they do." "I cannot live with that choice because it would be selfish." Just stop. Stop swallowing your own bullshit. It only keeps you in a cage. And you spend so many years and so much anguish over something that only you alone have the power to change. With logic and healthy decision making, you can change your entire life around. This is not about manifesting into a better place in your relationship. This is about DUMPING and MOVING ON FROM toxic shit that you should not be trying to fix. A broken pipe should be fixed. A misunderstanding should be fixed. Emotional abuse tells you to get out and not look back. Yes ----> 1000% YES. Just like those terrible habits you have. The ones that keep you unsuccessful, unhappy, lonely, stuck or down right depressed about your life. STOP DOING THAT JOB YOU HATE. I MEAN IT. STOP. Guess what? You have on average 79 years to live According to Google. Guess what? You work on average 90,000 hours in your lifetime. :O Guess what? You spent on average 6,570 days with your parents raising you before you went on to college or move out to get married, your own life, or start a job elsewhere. Guess what? You spend on average 49 years with your spouse if you marry and never divorce. Guess what else? You spend as long as your child is alive on "parenting them" and being in your life -----> because we all strive to build life long bonds with our babies. But the reality is we also have just 18 years with them before they want to make decisions on their own. That is 18 summers. That is influenced by if your habits with them were HEALTHY OR TOXIC. SO, PLEASE.... tell me again why you cannot leave that job, tell that family member NO, break up in that relationship, or become something more/else for yourself? It is all bullshit. The things we hide behind in order to remain in the cage. In order to let the roads be smooth. Fulfillment and happiness are great, but the growth you do and the journey there is paved with jagged rocks and sweat. YOU WILL NEVER GET OUT if you act on that basic instinct trauma has caused you to develop. That thing that justifies keeping things as is. And time stops for nobody. Leave the rehabilitation to the person who needs it and let them figure it out for themselves. Leave the bullshit position you hate to fill the seat of something you truly want to do for the next 54+ years of your life. Or even better, make it your decision to do many things in the next 54+ years to not just earn money and have to pay for shit BUT to thrive, taste, feel, smell, and enjoy the fuck out of your ONE life your current soul embodies. Get out and do that thang. No room for excuses. Published by Jean Soto JS Jaded Savior blog: jadedsaviorblog@gmail.com
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AuthorJean Soto, mother of 3 and wife, is a writer + artist in the Hudson Valley, NY community. Archives
December 2019
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