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#holidays #boundaries #trauma #healing #family

11/28/2019

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Happy Holiday Season!

Here is your healthy reminder that you do not need to put up with anyone's shit.

And while I fully encourage everyone to have open communication and honesty about their emotions, it is ALSO COMPLETELY VALID to make the decision to SKIP seeing specific family or people you were invited to go celebrate the Holidays with.

HEALTHY BOUNDARIES NEED TO BE SET.

AND YOU DO NOT NEED TO BE UNCOMFORTABLE, TEASED, MANIPULATED, GAS LIT, MOCKED, OR SHAMED BY A FAMILY MEMBER --> FRIEND --> OR ACQUAINTANCE
JUST BECAUSE IT'S A HOLIDAY.

TIS THE SEASON TO BE HEALTHY AND HAPPY.

DO WHAT MAKES YOU FEEL SAFE AND BRINGS YOU JOY.

******************☆********************

I have an Uncle that growing up would always get drunk at parties. He would talk loud and be completely harassing many people at the party with dumb or offensive jokes, bad language and even gas lighting behaviors.

I STOPPED WANTING TO SEE HIM after he brought up my teen pregnancy as a source of a joke during a holiday celebration.

He asked me if I was pregnant and tried to touch my stomach MANY times at Holiday parties and get togethers, until I was finally done and stopped going.

IT IS NOT OK TO PUT UP WITH THINGS THAT MAKE YOU UNCOMFORTABLE OR UPSET.

So whether it is your family, your inlaws, a "close friend" or someone from work ---> put your boundaries in motion.

AND KNOW THIS.

You are:

☆ VALID
☆ AMAZING
☆ LOVED
☆ UNIQUE
☆ BEAUTIFUL
☆ STRONG
☆ WORTHY

WORTHY.

Decide, without guilt, that you are worthy of love, respect, decency, honesty, loyalty, care, and honor.
And for those who are incapable of providing a safe environment that is respectful, it can be YOUR CHOICE to do something else.

☆ PLAN YOUR OWN CELEBRATION
☆ HONOR YOUR OWN HEART
☆ TAKE YOURSELF SOMEWHERE
☆ BE WITH THE PEOPLE WHO DO HONOR YOU

Do not put up with family or friends peer pressuring you or manipulating you into GOING BECAUSE IT'S:

■ JUST ONE DAY
■ NOT A "BIG DEAL"
■ "FAMILY"
■ TRADITION

Being treated in an UNHEALTHY way is NOT A TRADITION.

IT'S ABUSE.

♡

I want you to know that though it may be hard to have conversations, setting boundaries is not about the other person [their reaction or their feelings] -----> it's about YOURS.

Enjoy this Holiday Season by surrounding yourself with the things that make you feel safe and special. ♡♡♡♡
YOU ALWAYS DESERVE THAT.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO YOU FROM JADED SAVIOR BLOG.
J.S.
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Published by Jean Soto JS Jaded Savior blog: jadedsaviorblog@gmail.com
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    Jean Soto, mother of 3 and wife, is a writer + artist in the Hudson Valley, NY community. 

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TRIGGER WARNING:
Content mention of Rape, Abuse, Neglect, Addictions, Mental Illness, Kidnap, Molestation, Child abuse, Teen Pregnancy, Abortion, birth, body image, gender/identity dysphoria, sexuality, personal trauma, domestic violence and other extremely personal stories. Please practice caution. I am not a licensed physician or mental health professional. No medical prescribing is provided on this site, Only personal insights, experience stories,  and advice; All stories published have had prior authorization.  Questions? Contact Jean at:  jadedsaviorblog@gmail.com

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