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#selfproclamations #identity #truths #vulnerability #lotsoffucks

8/29/2019

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I am no super model.

I have nothing to "sell".

I make decisions based on intuition.


I have tons of fucks not given.

I swear and I have crude humor.

I dye my hair any color I want and I don't always comb it. Sue me.

I won't be buying any trends or begging to be anyones friend.

And that is not some alternative lifestyle either.

I am just tired of being anything other than me.

I wear my husbands tshirts.

I'm on a hiatus from bras and anything ending in "lettes" or "lattes".

I binge Netflix and prefer most books read to me on audible because I am too ADD to sit and stare at a book.

I have degrees but my job is based on passion and inner purpose, not a piece of paper.

I have a life partner but our love is based on earning each other daily, not a stamped certificate.

And I would get a divorce if he mistreated me.

I would disown family for mistreating me.

I am a survivor of trauma. Of child abuse, neglect, emotional and physical abuses. I am a survivor of lying and cheating boyfriends. Of almost fiances that could not bet their name on a nickel.

​
I am a thriver, driven by using art and writing as my fuel.

I am a creator and that skill saved my life countless times. So I would bet on it. And I would spend all my time doing it even if that meant I did not profit much.

I think sales and marketing are two different things. I do not fear money. But I have no trust for people who want to manipulate me to try their product or join their team without knowing a speck about me, just so they can pay their bills.

Because we all have bills to pay and I have been poor much of my life. So I know what it is like to live with no money and no food in the fridge. To just be thankful I had clothing.

And then to be willing to burn it all, any bridges or belongings, just to escape with my life.

I know what psychological warfare does when your parent manipulates you as a communication technique, between divorces and domestic violence, so you will cater to their illness.

I know what gentle parenting does to break that cycle of abuse, so I support it.

Just like I support positivity, being healthy, and making healthy decisions.
​

Not selling shakes but binge eating when no one is looking. Not faking diets and pushing them but not profiting from them.

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I support real, raw and good for you choices.

If what I do is not REAL, RAW, AND ORGANIC then I do not want it in my life.

That goes for food.
That goes for people.
That goes for business.
That goes for lifestyle.

So I don't want anyone's bullshit.
I am not down for a competition.
I am not looking for a battle.
I am not in it to win.
I do not want to gossip.
I don't care who is dating who.
I don't extend my nose passed my own face.
I don't ponder the greener grass. I'm busy trying to water my own.

So please don't offer me synthetic self esteem, beauty, or love.

I am not up for catching up with anyone that ever left me: NOT EXES, OLD FRIENDS OR FAMILY. ----> Because the exit sign does not have a revolving door.

I will never enable trauma, abuse, sexism, or any oppression's.

I will not laugh at anyone's racist memes, because its just the "popular thing to do."

I will say something if I see something.

I will report your ass if you do bad shit.

If someone steals from me, I'll take the compliment but leave ego at the door.

I am not an original mind.

I am a melting pot of the most beautiful concepts and positivity I can find, and my only wish is to offer what I create to those who believe in it. ♡
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Published by Jean Soto JS Jaded Savior blog: jadedsaviorblog@gmail.com
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    Jean Soto, mother of 3 and wife, is a writer + artist in the Hudson Valley, NY community. 

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TRIGGER WARNING:
Content mention of Rape, Abuse, Neglect, Addictions, Mental Illness, Kidnap, Molestation, Child abuse, Teen Pregnancy, Abortion, birth, body image, gender/identity dysphoria, sexuality, personal trauma, domestic violence and other extremely personal stories. Please practice caution. I am not a licensed physician or mental health professional. No medical prescribing is provided on this site, Only personal insights, experience stories,  and advice; All stories published have had prior authorization.  Questions? Contact Jean at:  jadedsaviorblog@gmail.com

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      ​EMPOWERING MINDS SINCE  2019

  • START
  • ABOUT
  • READ
    • Trauma Stories
    • J.S. Memoirs
    • Empowerment
    • Creative Writing
    • Poetry
    • Books
  • WRITE
    • JOURNALING
    • Submit healing story
    • Submit a secret
  • HEAL
    • Holistic
    • Spiritual
    • Self Help
  • SHOP