Don't let anyone tell you that your vision is crazy!
I have this new idea and people have already judged me for it, which only empowered me to do it more. And to make a BIG point to advocate all along the way. For my own dang genius. Here's the thing. Change always sounds crazy. To our body. To our mind. To the people around us. Because it is new, it seems a bit shaky. But how well does life pan out when we play it safe and stay in a bubble? Imagine if all the great inventors of the world decided to give up after the first person called them crazy !!!! Imagine where we would be as a society if we did not play it BIG or take risks.... The funny thing is, the people who do judge me are just feeling some triggers because I want to REBEL against the norm. I am not afraid to step out and be seen in my UGLY DAYS. In the last 10 months I have been writing openly and publicly about my worst moments. And nothing has been attached to it, NO expectations or deals at the end of my feels. I am a writer and my purpose is to actively advocate for those who struggle with PTSD + Anxiety + depression like I do [on the daily]. I am a #trauma survivor and I still struggle with the aftermath of abuse and the pain it caused me since BIRTH. But I am ALWAYS willing to show up with all the sticky, scary details. Because that has been my mission. Freedom through writing. A purging of my memory onto the page. To set myself free of all this pain. These insecurities. These triggers. I have been in poverty and struggles all my life. I want people to understand why. And not the social definitions or misconceptions about struggle and what it means to be without. That is not enough. I want to tell you the stories of how I survived my childhood and endured abuse in my teen years. How I managed being a teen mother raising a baby and how I got through college while raising her on my own. I want you to hear how I got into bad relationships, and I want you to know what they did to me. This IS TRAUMA. You can actively read about it on my blog. I want you to know what steps got me to where I am now. And that my life was so horrible in the beginning but has gotten better in the last decade because of the choices i made. I need to set the record straight for myself and others on what it actually feels like to have mentally ill parents and what kind of person I am in spite of it. Why do I need to do this for myself? Because I was manipulated for over 25 years into thinking it was all my fault because I was around abusive people. -----> but I wasn't. For those of you out there emotionally and mentally dying right now from the serious struggle of having narcissistic and or mentally ill people in your circle-----> these stories are for you. I am offering you validation as I discover it through education. One of my ideas I had last year was to get into educating myself so that I could share it as I heal. So I could actively give people what they needed to help THEMSELVES. I have learned my boundaries and emotions through the work but I have always been deeply insightful and have asked thought provoking questions. I have dared to play it big even when everyone around me says small is safe. Or that someone like me, with no family or resources, will never make it. Not in the big leagues. More like a side liner. The thing is, BIG for me means getting in front of more and more people to make big impact. To change the way we view survivors. The way we talk to them. The way we talk to one another. I want to set the bar super high for those of you struggling and actively encourage you to reach it. Every day. Not as a coach. Or a healer. Or a guru. Just as someone who spends every day reaching. My whole life, I hope I spend it running with my BIG IDEAS. Without needing to slap on titles and systems. That is just not ME. I know what works for ME now. I want to flow. Create. Be. And pave a pathway for others who need that reassurance that their idea of living healthy and happy as definition of "success" is, in fact, not CRAZY. J.S. Jaded Savior
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