​Deny anyone the ability to tear you down.
If you have been through hard shit, you have the absolute right to talk about it or write about it.
YOU HAVE FULL RIGHT TO ADVOCATE FOR YOURSELF.
Do not let anyone take that away because they did not see what you experienced, have no "proof" or even knew your abuser.
Do not let your OWN FAMILY dismiss the hardships you have gone through or the abuse you have survived.
Do not let friends or peers shame you for being open and honest with yourself and speaking your truths.
Speaking my truths has saved my life.
I began speaking up about the abuse when I was in 9th grade but it was not until early college that I got vocal and advocated.
In college, I walked around campus PROUD of being a single, young mother. EVEN THOUGH IT WAS HARD AND SCARY.
I got involved on campus and I started a club for parenting students. I spoke out in the student government association on campus as a female representative and made the change. THEY INSTALLED CHANGING TABLES IN THE PUBLIC BATHROOM OF THE ACTIVITIES CENTER BECAUSE OF ME SPEAKING UP. It was the first one ever installed!!!!
I spoke out about my exs and my parents. About the manipulation and abuse I had endured.
But speaking in person was not nearly as impactful as it is now getting up on Facebook + Instagram + Twitter to SPEAK MY TRUTHS.
I am here to heal.
And in the process, to dismantle the bullshit idea that we are all perfect and whole.
I am broken, but still going on and doing it with a ROAR.
The abusers in my life birthed and raised me.
Soon after I was tossed between abusive lovers and friendships because that is what happens to abuse victims who do not get help.
WHO DO NOT EVEN KNOW THEY ARE A TRAUMA SURVIVOR.
This year, I am going to get LOUDER.
I post pictures of the real me.
And I write stories that are raw, harsh, detailed, uncomfortable, scary, sad, and empowering AF.
It is empowering to finally say "I was raped".
It is freeing to finally say "I was too young. I felt I had no choice."
It is validation to finally testify to my own experiences and not have to line up defense like images of my bruises and dates or times I called the cops and filed a report.
When I was 17, I sued my own parents for neglect and abuse. This was a year after they had abandoned me to a relative and changed the locks on the doors, with no court order or lawful decisions made. Which meant they continued to claim me in taxes and evade child support laws. They abandoned their only child who was a minor. In effect, they also hid their addictions and record of domestic disputes + abusive treatment of me.
I ultimately "lost" the abuse charges because I had "no proof".
Speaking my truths is no longer about proof.
It is about growth.
Awareness.
TRUTHS that set OTHER victims free.
Today I saw a post about a woman speaking her truths and sharing how abusive her childhood was.
SOMEONE who knew the family commented SHAMING her and called her a spoiled brat / liar for the details she told.
This person had never seen how abusive the parents were. So their comment was not only dismissive of the TRUTHS told YEARS LATER but did what most people do who are clueless about how abuse works.
They defended the abuser.
JADED SAVIOR REPRESENTS A WARRIOR OF TRUTHS AND JUSTICE.
Being able to FINALLY speak up will set you free in body, mind, and spirit.
The pain of being silent can kill.
So think about that if you have a story untold.
And think even harder about your actions if you are someone who as dismissed someone else in the past for their truths.
I will never be able to prove my mom emotionally abused me.
I cannot unsee what she did to me and around me.
I will never be able to forget the taunting and attacks.
I have nightmares still of me trying to escape her house.
You now know the face of a victim.
You are looking right at her.
I do not share for pats or attention because "i need the glory" (yes, i have been told that).
I share because empowerment comes from those who felt the most pain and rose up to do something about it.
J.S. Jaded Savior