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I get a lot of anxiety while riding in the car, especially with my babies in the back.
It's not because of the car accidents I have experienced or the car sickness I sometimes feel.
It's not because of the memories I have of being in the car with my parents or scary car ride I once rode in the backseat of a drunk driver refusing to pull over.
I'm afraid of losing something good.
I do not want anything to take away the ones that I love most.
It feels hard to risk losing something I finally have after so many years of trauma and abuse.
All the obstacles I've overcome led me to 3 beautiful children and a relationship with a partner who is my best friend ------ I would travel to hell and beyond to protect them.
Love is at the epicenter of my healing and strength as a survivor.
Love has always kept me going, fighting, and pushing for more in life.
Whenever I was in an abusive situation, i knew it was not the answer or life meant for me.
I was not meant for a long life of destruction and dysfunction.
I just refused to believe that.
I now love my life, even though I'm still traveling towards awareness + good health + prosperity.
Love is what has set me free every time I've had struggles.
This past winter, I had a break through in my mindset and healing when I surrendered to all that is not perfect in myself.
I chose to just love me through the hard stuff.
The anxiety. Depression. PTSD.
The imperfections and mistakes.
The more I follow love, the closer I get to building the puzzle of my life. It is attracting the right friendships, opportunities and passions. Love is giving me a purpose in this world.
No one ever put any of these emotions into words like Jessie Ptak has.
While I normally sit anxiously in the passenger seat on long drives, today I followed my intuition and grabbed her book " a home in me " for the ride.
I do not just feel calm right now.
I feel understood.
♡ J.S. Jaded Savior
Jessie Ptak is a Poet from New York, who creates magic with every verse she writes. She shares her work mostly on twitter, and has many creative projects releasing this year , including another poetry book. https://twitter.com/jessmariewrites
Get a copy of this one here:
Content mention of Rape, Abuse, Neglect, Addictions, Mental Illness, Kidnap, Molestation, Child abuse, Teen Pregnancy, Abortion, birth, body image, gender/identity dysphoria, sexuality, personal trauma, domestic violence and other extremely personal stories. Please practice caution. I am not a licensed physician or mental health professional. No medical prescribing is provided on this site, Only personal insights, experience stories, and advice; All stories published have had prior authorization. Questions? Contact Jean at: email@example.com
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